Continued Covid Recovery during Blizzard

Going into my fourth week of Covid recovery and I’m still totally exhausted.  If I could, I would sleep practically around the clock.  I’ve also been experiencing horrible chills again.  I thank God for my electric blanket daily which I picked up on clearance for $6 a year ago.  I hope to find another one on clearance so I can have an electric throw for my recliner as well.  As soon as I get home from work I crawl into bed and take at least an hour nap, wake up, walk Blaze, try to eat something and then crawl back in bed and sleep through the night.  Thankfully, the cough is getting less severe and I’m having fewer major coughing fits. 

Saturday I slept most of the day.  As we’re in blizzard conditions all weekend, I was totally okay with burrowing into my blankets and resting.  I was having bouts of chills and my feet were freezing all day so staying under my electric blanket helped.  When I was awake, I read and scrolled on the computer.  There were a couple YouTube videos on the Franciscan Secular Order that I’ve been wanting to watch and I finally got those watched.  My son wanted me to do his taxes since he’d gotten his W-2, so I did that for him since he has a simple return.  I did manage to give Blaze a good walk last night during a break in the weather before collapsing in bed for the night.  We did a shortened version of our normal walk but he got some energy out.  He was starting to get skittish towards the end and as it’s coyote mating season I was starting to worry about coyotes being in the neighborhood.

Today, Sunday, I actually had a small amount of energy.  Temps were in the negatives so walking to church wasn’t an option and I watched it online.  What a blessing having that option is now!  We recently had Fr. Martin joined our parish and today was the first time I have heard him give a homily so that was exciting.  My little sleeping area needed a freshening up and I also needed to do laundry as well since I haven’t had any energy.  I really don’t like doing any housework on Sundays but even the disciples occasionally did things they weren’t allowed to do by Jewish law.  Sometimes to refresh the spirit one needs to do a bit of cleaning.  Poor Blaze went out to do his business and turned around and came right back in.  It takes me 10-15 minutes to get all my cold weather gear on to have him decide in 30 seconds he wasn’t going out in that mess.  Late in the afternoon I started having chills again so I crawled into bed for a nap.  

                           

This week I finished Inside the Cloistered Life Personal Letters of a Carmelite Nun by Sr. Marie of the Trinity and started St. Claire of Assisi The Unshakeable Faith and Miraculous Legacy of a Medieval Saint by Rev. Dominic Whitaker.  St. Claire of Assisi and Mine is the Night are on Kindle Unlimited.  I also started Mine is the Night One Perfect Murder Is Not Enough by Alex Wagner.  I’ve been wanting to start a good mystery with either a nun or priest like Father Brown or Sister Bonafast and this has both.  When I was too tired to read, I listened to Miss Marple mysteries on YouTube.  I know they’re AI generated stories but they’re very relaxing to listen to.  

Seeking silence

Have you ever asked God to help you with something and then totally missed the signs he was giving you in answer?  I’ve been truly struggling with how to do my prayer time, devotional reading, and especially my time of silence.  I’m really missing living by myself where I can control the chaos I allow around me while I’m temporarily living with my son and his family.  I’m confessing that my prayer and reading time has come to almost a stand still and I’ve been praying that God will show me how to get time back to spend with him.

“Be silent and know I am God…” Psalm 46:10  

Walking, especially our late evening walks, have been magical while I’ve been recovering from Covid.  The nearly constant snowfall, watching the snowflakes float down, and marveling over the snow reflecting all the Christmas lights has distracted me.  To try to be “productive” I’ve taken to listening to the Hallow app while walking thinking I was knocking two things out at once - yes I’m a recovering multi-tasker.  I’ve realized this has been a losing battle as I get distracted by things on our walks or just block out the voice/s.  Recently I turned Hallow on as we left for our evening walk and stopped at the end of the driveway and turned it off - I needed silence.  It was nearly a physical pain, I was in such desperate need of silence - not just silence but God’s silence.  It hurt at first since I’d gotten out of the habit of being in silence.  I think when we’re most uncomfortable with silence shows how much we really need it.  

While I was on this walk I was feeling uncomfortable that I should be doing something, praying or listening to something edifying - remember I’m a recovering multi-tasker.  Suddenly I remembered having heard someone speak and say that PRAISING GOD IS PRAYER!  Wow, it hit me then that my fascination with the beauty while walking was God showing me how to pray in silence.  I didn’t need to be saying the Rosary or reciting prayers, I needed to be silent and let God in.  This was my time to be with God and listen.